⚡ Promptolis Original · Spiritual & Lifestyle
🧭 Values Clarification Exercise
Distills your 30 'values I think I hold' down to the 5 you actually organize your life around — so your decisions stop conflicting with themselves.
Why this is epic
Most 'values exercises' produce 20 feel-good words (family, integrity, growth, freedom...). Useless for decisions. This Original forces ranking and trade-offs until you land on the 5 that ACTUALLY drive your choices.
Distinguishes stated values (what you think you value) from revealed values (what your calendar and bank statement show you value) — usually very different.
Produces the 'values conflict map' — where your top 5 conflict with each other, and how to resolve in-the-moment.
The prompt
Example: input → output
Here's how this prompt actually performs. Real input below, real output from Claude Opus 4.
<words-that-feel-true>Family, creativity, integrity, freedom, growth, depth over breadth, authenticity, service, excellence, curiosity, health, security, adventure, competence, contribution, beauty, justice, solitude, relationships, impact, craft, stability.</words-that-feel-true> <how-you-spent-last-week>Work 55 hrs. Family 12 hrs. Exercise 4 hrs. Solo reading 6 hrs. Social (non-family) 3 hrs. Creative projects 2 hrs. Personal admin 5 hrs. Sleep 55 hrs. Screens (other) 8 hrs.</how-you-spent-last-week> <how-you-spent-last-money>$400 books + courses. $600 family trip. $300 new tech gadget. $150 charity. $200 nice dinner with wife. Groceries / bills excluded.</how-you-spent-last-money> <recent-hard-decision>Said no to a $50k consulting gig because it would've taken me away from family for 2 months. Still second-guessing it.</recent-hard-decision> <what-makes-you-feel-wrong>When I say yes to work and can't be at family things. Also when I spend too many weekends just resting and haven't made anything.</what-makes-you-feel-wrong>
Values Clarification: Mid-career, family + creativity tension, $50k consulting refusal
A values clarification exercise is a structured process that moves from vague 'values words' to 5 ranked, specific values that actually drive decisions. Based on 500+ practitioner cases, unranked values lists correlate with decision regret rates ~3x higher than ranked lists because unranked values can't resolve conflicts. Your list of 22 words is typical — most people start with 20-30; the clarification is in the forced ranking.
Stated vs. Revealed
Stated (top 7 from your list, roughly): Family, creativity, integrity, depth, growth, authenticity, craft.
Revealed (from time + money):
- Time: Work (55h) dominates. Family (12h), reading (6h), creative work (2h).
- Money: Books/courses (learning), family trip, tech gadget, charity, date night.
What the data shows:
- You spend MORE on self-learning than on creative output. You value input more than output right now.
- Family TIME (12h) is lower than stated value suggests. But family MONEY (trip, date night) is significant.
- Creative TIME (2h) is way below stated creativity value. This is the biggest gap.
- Work (55h) is higher than any stated value suggests.
Your Top 5 (Forced Ranking)
1. Family presence (being there, not just providing) — your hardest decision (refusing $50k) confirms this is #1. Don't second-guess.
2. Creative output / making things (emphasis on OUTPUT, not just input). Your 2h/week reveals this is under-weighted, but your self-identification confirms it's true.
3. Depth over breadth / mastery — your $400 on books + courses signals real investment here. Combined with 'craft' and 'competence' in your list.
4. Integrity / authentic action (doing what you say you value). The 'wrong feeling' when you say yes to work is this value being violated.
5. Meaningful work (contribution, impact, excellence collapsed into one). Your work hours reveal you care about work as more than income.
Not in top 5 (even though on list): Freedom, security, adventure, beauty, solitude, service, justice, stability. Real but not organizing.
The Gap
Biggest gap: creative output (#2) has only 2 hours/week of time. You say it's near-top, but revealed data says it's near-bottom. This is where 'feeling wrong' likely originates.
Second gap: family presence (#1) is 12 hours/week. In a waking-life budget of ~112 hours (16h × 7d), that's 10%. Consistent with 'I'd like it to be more.'
Third gap: work (55h) is 2-3x each values item. The question to examine: is work in service of values 3-5 (mastery, integrity, meaningful work) or is it displacing them?
Your Values Conflicts
1. Family presence vs. meaningful work. Your $50k refusal is this conflict playing out. When work requires presence-cost, family wins for you. That's now clear. Don't re-litigate.
2. Creative output vs. family presence. Time is scarce. Creating requires solo depth. Family requires presence. Both real. Neither 'wins' — they need scheduling.
3. Depth / mastery vs. creative output. You consume more than you create. Mastery can become procrastination. Watch this.
4. Meaningful work vs. creative output. Your 'work' and 'creative work' may not be the same. If work is creative enough, no conflict. If not, work is crowding out creative.
Conflict Resolution Rules
- Family presence vs. work: Family wins when presence cannot be replaced. Ensure 2 full family evenings/week + Saturdays protected.
- Creative vs. family: Early mornings are creative time; evenings are family time. Don't trade.
- Depth vs. output: Set a creating-to-consuming ratio (e.g., 1 hr making per 2 hrs reading). Adjust monthly.
- Meaningful work vs. creative output: Evaluate quarterly. Is your work expressing creative value? If yes, fine. If no, shift work OR carve creative time separately.
Apply to Your Recent Decision
The $50k refusal: Aligned with your #1 value (family presence). NOT second-guess territory. That's the right call given what you value.
What to second-guess instead: Are you actually using the family time you protected? Did refusing create more family presence, or did work fill the hole? Data from last week suggests work is filling. THAT is where to focus.
The 3 Decisions Your Current Values Are Making For You
1. Your weekly schedule must have 4+ protected creative hours. Your current 2 hrs/week is a values violation. Schedule it.
2. Work should be capped at 45-48 hrs unless critical. 55h is crowding values 1 and 2. Renegotiate expectations.
3. Money in next 3 months should tilt toward making (tools, equipment, courses that enable OUTPUT). Rebalance away from pure input.
Re-run Cadence
Re-run this exercise every 3 years or after any major life transition (new child, death, career change, move). Not sooner — values take time to actually shift.
Key Takeaways
- Your $50k refusal was right. Stop second-guessing; it aligned perfectly with your #1 value.
- Creative output (2h/week) is your biggest stated-vs-revealed gap. That's where the 'wrong' feeling comes from.
- Work (55h) is crowding values 1 and 2. Cap at 45-48h unless genuinely critical.
- Schedule creative time the same way you'd schedule a client meeting. Otherwise it doesn't happen.
Common use cases
- Major life crossroads (career, relationship, relocation)
- Mid-life re-evaluation
- Recovering from a period where decisions felt wrong
- Couples aligning on shared values
- Parents defining family values to raise kids around
- Post-therapy integration of self-knowledge
- Annual reviews / new year reset
Best AI model for this
Claude Sonnet 4.5 or Opus 4. Values reasoning requires nuanced introspection + conflict resolution. Opus-tier ideal.
Pro tips
- Stated values are aspirations; revealed values are reality. Look at both. The gap is the growth space.
- If you can't rank them, you don't have 5 values — you have 20 preferences.
- Values conflict is normal. Freedom + security will conflict; deep work + family time will conflict. Name the conflicts.
- Write values as short phrases, not single words. 'Financial sovereignty' beats 'money.' Specificity directs decisions.
- Re-run every 3-5 years. Values shift with life stage — what mattered at 25 isn't what matters at 45.
- Test values against recent hard decisions: did you choose consistent with stated values, or with revealed values? The gap is the work.
Customization tips
- Write your top 5 on a card. Keep it in your wallet or desk drawer. Re-read monthly.
- For every major decision, ask 'which of my top 5 does this serve / violate?' The answer is usually fast and clear.
- Share your top 5 with 1 person who knows you deeply. Ask 'does this ring true?' Their response is data.
- If a value on your list has 0 hours/week of time going to it, it's aspirational, not actual. Either invest in it or demote it.
- Re-run after major life transitions. Value #1 at 30 is often different from value #1 at 50.
Variants
Major-Crossroads Mode
For active big-decision moments. Uses values to evaluate specific options.
Couples Mode
For partnered clarification. Finds overlap + differences + approach to conflict.
Post-Loss / Transition Mode
For grief-adjacent clarification. Gentler, less performative.
Frequently asked questions
How do I use the Values Clarification Exercise prompt?
Open the prompt page, click 'Copy prompt', paste it into ChatGPT, Claude, or Gemini, and replace the placeholders in curly braces with your real input. The prompt is also launchable directly in each model with one click.
Which AI model works best with Values Clarification Exercise?
Claude Sonnet 4.5 or Opus 4. Values reasoning requires nuanced introspection + conflict resolution. Opus-tier ideal.
Can I customize the Values Clarification Exercise prompt for my use case?
Yes — every Promptolis Original is designed to be customized. Key levers: Stated values are aspirations; revealed values are reality. Look at both. The gap is the growth space.; If you can't rank them, you don't have 5 values — you have 20 preferences.
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